sex trafficking Archives - Page 3 of 11 - Shared Hope International

April 1, 2013 by SHI Staff

Guest Post: A Man to Fight for You

When he was little, Ricky battled with what he thought was a series of bad dreams. They would send him into a state of panic. But there was no way he could fight them because he was still asleep. See, they weren’t bad dreams after all. They were actually night terrors.

As he got older, they became more frequent. He married his high school crush and she became instantly aware during those nights, of how he felt attacked. They’d laugh over coffee the next morning, about how he grabbed all the sheets off the bed and paced, breathless, looking for an exit for ten minutes. Other nights, she’d roll onto her side and ask, “what were you choking on this time?” He’d give her an uncomfortable smile and reply with some random object…a needle, a lightbulb, a drinking glass. How ridiculous. But how real it seemed to him in the moment. If only he could fight back the fear in that dreamlike state.

It became a familiar battle against this evil. The terrors would attack without warning and be met with little to no resistance. How unfortunate and a bit embarrassing, I suppose, to be a man and not be able use your God-given ability to fight against fear and evil.

There’s a battle raging that men need to fight in. But they are fighting for another’s freedom, not their own. Thousands of girls are the casualties. They’re fighters, and yes, I’ve met some. But they have only earned that title because a man didn’t fight for them when they needed it most. Those men — their daddies, stepdads, big brothers – were locked away in their own state of self-induced sleep…lulled by a myriad of addictions to mind-numbing substances, porn, denial, work.

Those men, expected to protect her, lost the presence of mind and in many cases even the conviction to fight. Slowly choked out was their ability to discern her worth. And so regardless of the reason, they were not present to fight for her. But what is a man if not a fighter for good? He is as helpless as he is useless.

I spoke with a girl today who longed for that man’s presence as a child. When fair-skinned “Lyla” was five, her daycare provider’s son stole her innocence for a moment of his selfish pleasure. The moments as such recurred in various forms: drugged in a club, exploited on a sidewalk, even restrained on motel sheets by a serial rapist. Her worth felt like a slow drain. Would any man ever treat her with dignity? No matter how she mined for ways, Lyla knew no way out. Her flight or fight instincts took over. And since there was no other man who’d honored her enough to fight for her, she would give it her best shot. It never really sufficed.

“You daydream about it,” She admitted. “You need a hero. You you need someone who is bigger and stronger than you. Someone of the same gender as those who hurt you… but who instead, redeems it all.” The sincerity from her wounds seems to speak, “Wake UP! I know the evil is ugly and it is painful, but please, wake up. Tell us we’re worth fighting for and get up…and do it. Fight for me because they never could. Or never would.” And she whispers, “Give me hope again.”

Chelan Rene’ Russ is an avid abolitionist, wife, mother, and blogger who lives in Portland, OR with her husband and 2 children. Visit her personal blog here.

March 7, 2013 by SHI Staff

Survivor Story: Robin’s Journey to Redemption and Restoration

My name is Robin. I was born in Portland, OR but grew up my whole life across the river, in Vancouver, WA. I was fortunate enough to be raised in a home where I could feel safe and know I was loved. My mother took me to Sunday school and taught me the love of Jesus. Every teacher I ever had liked me and I did we’ll in school. Growing up I was popular, and had a lot of friends.

I became alcoholic after my first drink at 14-years-old. Gradually through my adolescence, I began experimenting with other substances and they became more important to me than school. After miserably failing almost two years of college, I dropped out. I had just turned 21 before I met the man who sold me a dream. The dream turned into a nightmare and the nightmare lasted six years. In those six years I was prostituted up and down the I-5 corridor from Seattle to San Francisco, Los Angeles, Phoenix, Las Vegas, and Honolulu, Hawaii. I walked away from my pimp in 1999, penniless, alcoholic, and addicted to crack-cocaine. I have never gone back to him.

It took me over 12 years away from the life to be strong enough to really look at what had happened to me. I was 21 years old when my pimp walked into my life and because I was an “adult”, I always carried the guilt and shame for “choosing” this lifestyle. I wasn’t ready to look at my past until I learned about my past. Once I learned about my past, I gathered enough strength and humility to tell my story. Telling my story and backing it up with the truths, rather than misconceptions about prostitution, allowed me to heal. When I saw myself as a victim, no matter my age- that’s when I was able to forgive myself and move on.

Defenders were few and far between when I was living in the streets where men bought and sold women and young girls for sex. There was only one Defender who could save me from the bondage of sex-trafficking; that Defender was Jesus! I often wonder if my life would have turned out differently if there were more men of God living as Defenders.

Despite growing up in a good home, learning manners and respect, no one taught me to love or respect myself. When I see men taking the Defender’s pledge today, my heart fills with love and hope for the future; but I don’t see enough men taking the pledge. I want to see our nation’s leaders, our pastors, and our teachers taking the pledge.

I want to see these men teaching our sons how to live as Defenders of women and how to stand up against immorality — without feeling like there is something wrong for doing so. When a man promises not to purchase or participate in pornography, prostitution or any form of the commercial sex industry, demand decreases.

“But as for you, O man of God, flee these things. Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness” (1 Tim 6:11). When a man promises to hold his friends accountable for their actions toward women and children, our daughters become safer and demand decreases. “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another” (Prov. 27:17). When a man promises to take immediate action to protect those he loves from this destructive market, families are not torn apart and demand decreases. “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (1 Tim 5:8).

When I see men taking the pledge to be a Defender, I see God moving.

Robin became involved with trafficking when she was recruited by a pimp in 1993. After six years of abuse and many near death experiences, she was delivered by her Savior Jesus Christ in 1999. In June 2012, Ms. Miller earned her bachelor’s degree in Social Science from Portland State University. She is active as an advocate for victims of sex-trafficking. Today Robin is the volunteer coordinator and receptionist for a non-profit organization in Vancouver, WA.

February 5, 2013 by SHI Staff

4 Ways to Fight Sex Trafficking

Anyone can join the fight against domestic minor sex trafficking. Here are 4 simple ways you can take action today. Share them with your friends, family, and coworkers. Let’s each do our part and together end demand for sex trafficking.

1. Write a letter to your local media editor or congressional representative, to inform them
about domestic minor trafficking. Let your representatives and newspapers know that victims of
child sex trafficking exist in every state, even your own. Ask your legislators to commit to providing
safe shelters for victims, and increased penalties for buyers and traffickers. The more phone
calls, letters, and emails your legislator receives, the more action will occur. Visit our “Join the
Cause” page for more information.

2. Fight for justice online! Use social media and blogs to spread the word to your online community
of friends, family and neighbors. Participate and invite your friends to our Facebook or
Twitter accounts. Spread awareness by sharing videos, blogs, articles, pictures and other information
via social media. Join the conversation on YouTube, Vimeo, Twitter or Facebook (for both
the Defenders and Shared Hope).

3. Host or attend an awareness event in your community! How? Host an awareness event, sports
competition, fundraiser, candlelight vigil, march, movie screening, dinner, walk, run, yoga or
Zumba class with free materials and information provided by Shared Hope International.
Who’s in charge? You are! Gather your friends, neighbors and colleagues. We’ll also connect you
with other Shared Hope supporters in your area. Together, we can make a difference!

4. Join the cause! Become an Ambassador of Hope or a Defender. Ambassadors of Hope go
through an online or in-person training to become equipped to speak on behalf of Shared Hope
International. Defenders are men who take a pledge and take action to fight against domestic minor
sex trafficking and the commercial sex industry. Visit www.theDefendersUSA.org for more
information.

Click here to download the “4 ways to take action” pdf

December 12, 2012 by SHI Staff

Overcoming the Past: Understanding Through Renting Lacy

Guest Blog Post by Zen Loveall

False beliefs: I use to think that porn, strip clubs, and affairs were all O.K. I thought this was just part of being a guy. I use to think that my wife’s inability to satisfy me sexually was due to a problem with her. I am not hurting anyone. Women in porn and strip clubs want to do what they are doing and I am helping my mistresses by giving them the sex that they need. TV, movies, bars, clubs, advertising, magazines, and the Internet all fully supported these false beliefs.

What was my reality? I was using sex and fantasy for the wrong things and so too much would never be enough. Regular porn, and small amounts use to be O.K., but over time I needed more and more. Eventually, I was a walking dead man that lost total control of his sexual desires, living a fantasy life in my head, destroying my marriage, causing deep harm to the women that came into my life, all while supporting an industry that destroys women and children.

I was afraid of feeling my feelings and I had a lot of bad feelings. I did not understand that you can’t stop the bad feelings without stopping the good ones. I used the objectification of women and fantasy as an escape. Eventually I had no feelings…I was like a walking dead man. I wanted intimacy but bought into the myth that sex with a woman was intimacy. Sure it is a form of physical intimacy, but it is not real intimacy. You cannot have true intimacy with an object and that is what women had become for me. When I was out with my wife or friends I would just check out all the women in the room and spin fantasies in my mind around how these “objects” could satisfy me.

After I started to come out of my delusion, it took me years to turn this around. For over 15 years in my marriage, I made my wife feel less than and defective because she could not meet my insatiable sexual needs. I will have to spend the rest of my life trying to make up for that crime. I spent years in recovery groups around sex and I always use to wonder why don’t I see more strippers and prostitutes in recovery? The book “Renting Lacy” helped me to understand this. Very few of these young women make it into recovery because most of them die. The movie “The Whistleblower” also helped me to understand what I was contributing to.

When I read the book “Renting Lacy” and contemplated all the women and children suffering from this I cried and cried. I can never make that right, but I can support groups like Shared Hope and The Defenders and continue to come out of my delusion, learn to respect women as people, and continue to learn to be present and truly alive.

– Zen Loveall

September 25, 2012 by SHI Staff

Return to India: A Warm Welcome at the Brothel

The oppression of the brothel is palpable, assaulting all the senses in unison. The stench of the street mingles with the sickening sweet mask of incense, the dank narrow staircases feel like upward winding tunnels, each floor reveals clusters of women—lovely, dressed for work, bejeweled bodies, empty gazes staring. Quiet, there is no chatter. They languish. It’s hot; it is the slow season.

Each floor is owned by a separate brothel owner and we wind our way to the topmost floor where Reshma is the brothel owner. Timothy is welcome there, a rare visitor gaining entrance through trust. Like many of the brothel owners, Reshma herself was trafficked and her only memories are contained there. She wanted her own children to have a life away from that place, so entrusted them to Sparsh’s care. Two years ago along with Reshma we met one of her ladies, a very beautiful and sad Rekah, who also had given her two children into Sparsh’s care. Later that day at Sparsh we see Rekah again—now a transformed woman! She smiles broadly as she describes her new life reunited with her children, helping in the home and going to cosmetology school.

Reshma is more compassionate than most brothel owners and says she will come out as soon as her debts are paid. On this day we visit with four ladies that work for her. Haseena looks very downcast and holds her naked nine month baby boy as she pours water into his bird mouth from a plastic bottle top . How will baby Imran grow up there? What chance does he have? Rupa tells us she worked in a sari factory very long hours and made $2 or $3 for a 12 hour day; when she was offered the opportunity for similar work at higher pay in Pune she seized the moment… that ended up here. She will stay, she says, because she cannot read or write and she has three children somewhere.

Is there something you would like to do if you were freed from this place? Rupa and another girl giggle nervously. Puzzled by a question that called for a vision of a future beyond these walls, Rupa asks us how learning to read and write could help someone. Each of the ladies’ stories were the similar—they were tricked or sold into this life. Now here, with children to care for, with no education, they are trapped. We look on as Reshma helps dress Rupa for work, carefully folding the beautiful sequined sari and fastening a sparkling necklace. They urge Elizabeth to try on a sari—turquoise to match her t-shirt…everyone laughs and takes pictures of Rupa and Elizabeth together. But Elizabeth gets to leave.

To view the complete facebook photo album, click here.