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Home>Archives for prostitute

December 12, 2012 by SHI Staff

Overcoming the Past: Understanding Through Renting Lacy

Guest Blog Post by Zen Loveall

False beliefs: I use to think that porn, strip clubs, and affairs were all O.K.  I thought this was just part of being a guy. I use to think that my wife’s inability to satisfy me sexually was due to a problem with her. I am not hurting anyone. Women in porn and strip clubs want to do what they are doing and I am helping my mistresses by giving them the sex that they need. TV, movies, bars, clubs, advertising, magazines, and the Internet all fully supported these false beliefs.

What was my reality? I was using sex and fantasy for the wrong things and so too much would never be enough. Regular porn, and small amounts use to be O.K., but over time I needed more and more. Eventually, I was a walking dead man that lost total control of his sexual desires, living a fantasy life in my head, destroying my marriage, causing deep harm to the women that came into my life, all while supporting an industry that destroys women and children.

I was afraid of feeling my feelings and I had a lot of bad feelings. I did not understand that you can’t stop the bad feelings without stopping the good ones. I used the objectification of women and fantasy as an escape. Eventually I had no feelings…I was like a walking dead man.  I wanted intimacy but bought into the myth that sex with a woman was intimacy. Sure it is a form of physical intimacy, but it is not real intimacy. You cannot have true intimacy with an object and that is what women had become for me. When I was out with my wife or friends I would just check out all the women in the room and spin fantasies in my mind around how these “objects” could satisfy me.

After I started to come out of my delusion, it took me years to turn this around. For over 15 years in my marriage, I made my wife feel less than and defective because she could not meet my insatiable sexual needs.  I will have to spend the rest of my life trying to make up for that crime. I spent years in recovery groups around sex and I always use to wonder why don’t I see more strippers and prostitutes in recovery? The book “Renting Lacy” helped me to understand this. Very few of these young women make it into recovery because most of them die.  The movie “The Whistleblower” also helped me to understand what I was contributing to.

When I read the book “Renting Lacy” and contemplated all the women and children suffering from this I cried and cried. I can never make that right, but I can support groups like Shared Hope and The Defenders and continue to come out of my delusion, learn to respect women as people, and continue to learn to be present and truly alive.

– Zen Loveall

March 24, 2011 by Guest

Lawrence Taylor: Busted, Not Broken

In an interview with Fox News Insider, former NFL football star, Lawrence Taylor, displays bluntness about his solicitation of a prostituted minor despite his slick attitude and several off the cuff comments. Surely, few believe that this super star was properly punished when he was sentenced to a mere 6 years of probation on March 22 for buying sex with a girl who looked young enough for Taylor to ask her age and mentioned the presence of a pimp. And even though LT got off the hook in court, he admits the worst punishment of all is bearing the shame of his actions to his wife.

While Taylor accepts his conviction saying “I’ll take my punishment like I should” (1:45), he displays a great misunderstanding of the weight of what he has done to a child forced into a life of commercialized sex. “It’s a world of prostitution and you never know what you’re gonna get” (3:28). Taylor says that sometimes the girls are pretty, and sometime they are ugly, describing them as products rather than people—a disturbingly common attitude among millions of buyers of sex.

Stemming from this attitude, Taylor pities himself as a man seeking a “clean” transaction rather than feeling remorse for the crimes inflicted against the child who is one of thousands who are trafficked within the U.S. every year. In his justification, he claims that “I’m not the cause of prostitution,” (1:05) but if all common buyers stopped demanding sex—even from lonely football stars on long, 11 day trips—prostitution would cease to exist as we know it.

“It’s one of those crimes—I guess you call it crimes—where you never think you’re gonna get busted because everybody does it, you know? Until you get busted. Then it’s more embarrassing than anything else” (5:20). There’s no guessing here. Underage prostitution—which is human trafficking by definition—is illegal despite lack of knowledge, and despite lack of guilt.

Lawrence Taylor, thanks for showing the world what your average buyer looks like…an unremorseful, everyday, average Joe.  Your demonstration of ignorance shows us why normal men need to be educated about the devastating effects of human trafficking; because it’s not about the pitiful lonely man.  It’s about 100,000 American children that become victims of human trafficking each and every year.

Look for key misunderstandings of prostitution in interview with LT:

  • “I’m not the cause of prostitution.” (1:05)
  • “It’s a world of prostitution and you never know what you’re gonna get.” (3:28)
  • “I didn’t really want a relationship; I’m not looking for a relationship.” (4:23)
  • “It’s all clean,” [in reference to feelings]. (4:30)
  • “I’m not saying it’s alright, but God, it’s the oldest profession in the world.” (4:43)
  • “I guess you call it crimes.” (5:21)

Look for the prevalence of human trafficking and prostitution in everyday American culture:

  • “You can start by just opening up the phone book.” (5:01)
  • “I have used the services before.” (5:14)
  • “Everybody does it.” (5:28)

Share your findings:
Be sure to share this post via email, facebook, and/or twitter because it’s so incredibly important to change attitudes towards this crime!  Lawrence Taylor’s defense demonstrates a classic buyer’s reaction to getting caught which focuses on his own justification rather than the child’s victimization.  All the while, his hesitation and body language reveal that despite all reasoning, he knows that “it’s not alright” (4:43).

January 7, 2010 by SHI Staff

What’s Wrong with Calling a Child a Prostitute?

Although the media will tell you otherwise, child prostitutes do not exist in America. However, prostituted children DO exist.  The difference?  A child cannot be a prostitute because she/he is a victim of commercial sexual exploitation and the federal law defines this child as a victim of sex trafficking.  The difference in language is critical if we are to make progress in national efforts to rescue and restore child victims of sex trafficking.

Shared Hope International (SHI) recently published The National Report on Domestic Minor Sex Trafficking: America’s Prostituted Children which compiled more than four years of research into the problem of child sex trafficking in America, done with support from the U.S. Department of Justice.  The problem of incorrect and damaging labels being applied to child victims of sex trafficking presented itself as a primary barrier to the identification, rescue and proper treatment of these children.

First, it is important to recognize that prostitution is illegal in the United States (except for select counties in Nevada where adults can legally sell sex in licensed venues). Even countries which have legalized prostitution make it a crime to control someone in prostitution (pimping).  The United States Congress specifically made it a federal crime to transport juveniles with the intent to engage them in criminal sexual activity one hundred years ago with the passage of the Mann Act (White Slavery Act).  The Trafficking Victims Protection Act of 2000 (TVPA) reinforced this position by clearly defining severe forms of trafficking to include the use of a child under 18 years of age in a commercial sex act.

The term “child prostitute” implicates the child in the criminal activity of prostitution and contradicts the well-established history in America of acting in the best interest of the child.  The term denies the child the legal status of victim of a violent crime, thereby creating a barrier to accessing statutorily mandated victim compensation and services.  Stripped of the status of a true victim, the child is seldom if ever afforded  appropriate treatment and rehabilitation.

In America, the average age for a child to be recruited by a trafficker (pimp) into commercial sexual exploitation is just 13 years old.

It begs the questions: What is a child doing on the street?  And, how does she get there? These children are predominantly girls.  They have usually encountered a variety of abusive experiences which increase their risk of vulnerability to a trafficker’s tactical deception.  A comprehensive study of 104 juvenile victims of sex trafficking in Clark County, Nevada revealed that 82 percent were runaways, 47 percent were rape victims, and 89 percent used narcotics.

Consider the following situation of a child sex trafficking victim – is this a “child prostitute” or a “prostituted child?”

She is first molested by her mother’s boyfriend at the age of five. With a steady stream of abusive characters in and out of her life, a house full of drug dealing and using, she is befriended by an older man at 12 years old who promises to care for her and give her a life far safer than her own. Young, vulnerable and eager to be loved, she accepts. However, the promises aren’t fulfilled. She is forced to stand on the streets, scantily clad in the early hours of the morning…approaching strangers and forced to sell her body for sex, hand jobs, acts that seem completely foreign to her. Forced to fulfill a quota of $1000, she services up to twenty men a night – handing every penny to the pimp to avoid being beaten. She is arrested time and time over and misunderstands her innocence when she is constantly labeled a prostitute by law enforcement. She misunderstands her relationship with her pimp, whom she protects from law enforcement because she believes she is ‘loved’ by him. She misses her 14th and 15th birthdays. By the time she is 16, she can’t imagine a life any different. She claims ownership over her job because, well, she doesn’t see a way to escape and she’s beginning to think it’s the only thing she’ll ever be good at doing.

How can these victimized girls call out for help if they don’t even realize their right to be rescued? When law enforcement arrests the prostituted child as a child prostitute, when social service providers call her a prostitute or promiscuous, when her trafficker rewires her mind to make her believe that this life is all she is worthy of, how can we help our girls realize otherwise? The key to rescuing and restoring our American girls is to label them appropriately as prostituted children.

From the media to law enforcement and members of the community, we all have a part to play in the proper identification and response to America’s prostituted children. Terminology that accurately depicts these children as victims will lead to their identification by first responders as victims of domestic minor sex trafficking – prostituted children. SHI research has found that domestic minor sex trafficking victims more readily disclose information about their exploitation when they are addressed as survivors. Furthermore, having a single label for the crime allows multiple agencies, communities, and regions to effectively track, research, and intervene in a single coordinated effort.

A prostituted child deserves freedom from commercial sexual exploitation. A first step we can take in moving this liberation forward is to change perception through a careful use of the label we are applying to the victim.  Each one of these enslaved children is a prostituted child.

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