Awareness Archives - Shared Hope International

October 7, 2024 by Leif Larson

Greetings attendees of the 2024 JuST Training Conference.

My name is Marian, and I’m a grateful OG survivor!

This year, I celebrated 20 years clean and sober and out of life. At the some time, I am 10 years healed from triple-negative breast cancer.

While maintaining sobriety and health issues are experiences mainstream society faces, those of us moving forward after the trauma of paid rape have a challenging journey.

The road from victim to survivor to survivor leader is an individual journey. Along the way, we bond with others at different points of our growth, sharing experiences, failures, and triumphs.

I want to let you know of a unique opportunity for attendees of this year’s jUST conference. We, the ‘Older Gals; or ‘Older Generation’ of survivor leaders, will be your opening keynote session,

OG’s Speak Out: Navigating Life Beyond Exploitation

Some refer to us as ‘Elder Survivors,’ a term of endearment and respect, because we have had rich journeys as survivor leaders for decades. We are friends, colleagues, and, most of all, sisters.

Our sisterhood has standard systems of prostitution and the journey out. It is that journey out that we will share in our conversation with each other and you. Meet my sisters!

Hello, I’m Vednita

I am the founder of Breaking Free. Younger generations tell me in group settings that things are different from when I was “in the life.” I ask, how? You’re still exploited, whether it’s direct or indirect exploitation. The technology may evolve, but the degradation of being used, purchased for a price for sex, or pornographic imagery still reduces you to an object.

Hello, I’m Terry

I joined the movement when I met Vednita Carter, Founder of Breaking Free. She introduced me to the issues surrounding exploitation, and it was then that I understood I was not alone. I began reading books by fellow survivors like Andrea Dworkin and articles by Melissa Farley and Gail Dines. In reading the stories, I started to see a bigger world where hope sprung. I had so many questions and didn’t know where to find the answers because I was afraid to voice my fears. Many of the answers came from conferences like JuST.

Hello, I’m Audrey

Those of us who have been in the movement for a while have much to offer. You have some up-and-coming leaders who are missing an opportunity to learn from OG’s! Mistakes we’ve made, like not prioritizing self-care and learning when to say no. Women of color share experiences and bring awareness so they don’t feel alone when discouraging things arise. They can keep moving forward and work with allies who want to support them, but they often need to hear from survivors to do so successfully. It can help you reach back and gather strength from OGs to keep moving against the naysayers and the struggles.

We are looking forward to hosting you in a salon, which has its roots in the aristocracy of France in the late 17th and 18th centuries.

Historically a male-dominated structure, the gathering discussed literature, art, philosophy, music, and, of course, politics. It was to become the model for the feminist movement, providing a space to discuss issues of social status and power.

There is no better forum to discourse on the disenfranchised and disempowered due to sexual violence. In this intimate setting, without harsh light, seated in a circle, tears may flow, and laughter may follow. Heartbeat to heartbeat, humanity is the goal—dignity and respect for all.

Delving into life after various systems of prostitution will allow you a unique opportunity to engage with us older gals as we share our multifaceted path to healing.

Our journeys range from the 1980s to 2024. We are providing not only personal perspectives but also historical, socioeconomic, legal, and political viewpoints.

Street, online, and image-based exploitation will be discussed, as well as laws used against us and laws we fought for!

We have a deep bench to use a sports phrase. From Executive Directors and officers of NGOs to policy experts and civilian law enforcement, our experience has, in many ways, established lasting threads in the tapestry of the “movement.”

Those threads are sinew binding together adversity, disrespect, pain, and loss with strength, healing, love, and liberation. This is the reality of our tapestry: never forgetting what we’ve been through but choosing to live forward-thinking and focused.

Join the conversation with us, the ‘old gals,’ the ‘older generation’ of survivor leaders, as we allow the strength of our friendship and accomplishments to give hope. Survivors and allies, come one, come all!

“Through our narratives, we aim to offer insights from our diverse journeys. From rebuilding shattered self-esteem to reconciling with loved ones, we have faced and overcome many challenges. Our stories illuminate the profound wisdom gained through adversity and the sacredness of the journey toward wholeness.”

Audry, Marian, Terry, and Vednita

June 13, 2014 by Guest

My 6-Year-Old Daughter Introduced Me to Sex Trafficking

By: Gunnar Simonsen

When my daughter was little she received $30 for her birthday that she could spend on whatever she wanted. Of course, we thought she would want to spend it on a stuffed animal or toy.

But we were wrong. Very wrong.

When her mom asked her what she wanted to spend it on, she asked for the catalog we received from a non-profit humanitarian organization. It was the kind where you could purchase things like goats, chickens, food, and clothing for people in need throughout the world.

We figured she would want to buy some chickens for a family or clothing for a child, tangible items she was familiar with. But as she looked through the catalog, she kept turning the pages until she found what she was looking for.

What she did next, we’ll never forget.

She found the page she was looking for. She decided to spend her $30 to help girls and boys who had been rescued from sex trafficking.

She was 6 years old.

When asked why she chose to spend her money that way, she responded with “as an only child, these are the brothers and sisters I never had. I need to take care of them.”

In that moment I learned that too often the difference between adults and children was simply that children still believe they can change the world.

She went on to raise several thousand dollars to help more children.

Through the eyes of my 6-year-old daughter, this was my introduction to sex trafficking. I would also learn soon after that sex trafficking wasn’t just something that only happened in other countries, it was also happening in my own backyard.

I met up with a friend of mine shortly after my daughter donated her birthday money to aid victims of trafficking. He was blown away by her heart to help others. He then paused, looked me straight in the eye, and said four words…

Don’t let her down.”

It was like a thousand arrows had simultaneously hit their mark. Those four words still pierce my heart to this day.

It has been ten years since my daughter introduced me to sex trafficking. Ten years since she introduced me to brothers and sisters I, too, never had. Ten years since she opened my eyes to this scourge on humanity.

For me, “don’t let her down” meant that with sex trafficking happening in my own backyard, there was work to do.

Since then, I found myself actively engaged in the fight to eradicate sex trafficking. From the incredible inspiration of many new friends (the brothers and sisters I never had) who have survived being sex trafficked to organizations like Shared Hope International and their work to prevent, restore, and bring justice in this fight, my heart’s cry is that maybe, just maybe, my actions have begun to live up to the impact of those first $30.

For certain, there is much work left to be done and sadly too many who need yet to be freed. And so, because a 6 year old paid it forward with everything she had, how could I not go forth and do the same?

On this Father’s Day, I will look back with thankfulness on these past ten years since my eyes were opened. Certainly what I saw was anything but something to be thankful for. However, because of my daughter, I not only saw the effects of sex trafficking, I was now responsible to do my part in ending the cause of sex trafficking, too. In this, I simply could not let her, and the many brothers and sisters that she and I never had, down.

So it is because of her actions that on this Father’s Day, I truly do reflect back on the past ten years with thankfulness. Thankfulness to a daughter that helped me return to that belief I once had as a child, in that perhaps I too can help change the world.

What about you?

May 8, 2013 by SHI Staff

Defenders Awareness Benefit Concert

Join us at a benefit concert for the Defenders at Crossroads Church in Vancouver, WA on June 1, 2013 from 6:30-9:00 pm. Featuring local bands Ninth & Final and James Younger. All proceeds from ticket sales will go to the Defenders program, which will help us continue to defend, protect, and restore women and children exploited through the commercial sex industry.

[youtuber vimeo=’https://vimeo.com/67146427′]

Suggested Donation Minimum $3 Per Ticket

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October 29, 2012 by SHI Staff

Sharing Your Adventure: Loving One Another Enough to Hold Each Other Accountable

Love. Care. Tenderness. Support. These are all character qualities that are essential to the Defenders. These qualities in my mind all describe one important value of the Defenders: accountability. According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, accountability means “an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions.”

I always grew up with the term “brother’s keeper.” Brother’s Keeper is a simple term that means you love someone enough to hold them accountable to their actions. In my experience, accountability is only successfully done when both parties hold each other accountable out of common love for the wellbeing of the other person. Part two of The Defenders Pledge says “I will hold my friends accountable for their actions towards women and children.”

Women and Children deserve respect. They deserve to be honored, and we should treat them with that in mind. Human Trafficking and commercial sex takes advantage of women, makes them our objects, and that in no way is right. Out of love for our friends and the women and children who are involved in the industry, should we not hold each other accountable and stay away from that? Out of love and care for the wellbeing of our fellow men, should we not hold each other accountable to our actions? Should we not challenge each other? That’s why part two of the Defenders pledge exists. Out of love and respect for women and children, indulging in the commercial sex industry is clearly not an option.

But as I’ve said in previous blog posts, commercial sex can be an addictive indulgence. It can consume our lives, and pretty soon, quitting this terrible indulgence is harder than we thought. That is also where accountability comes in.Accountability can work as a powerful sword. Holding our fellow men accountable to their actions can fight those desires to indulge, and for some, completely eliminate them. For many, accountability also becomes a shield, which defends our hearts and restores our minds. I’ve experienced this effect personally through a Men’s group which I’ve called Men Mentoring Men.

This group consists of 5-8 men who are committed to meeting once each week to talk about life. We talk about the highs, lows, and struggles of the past week–both sexually and relationally. This group helps men grow in relationship with each other, and restore a healthy view of relationships and sexuality. We laugh, we cry, and we celebrate. This group creates a sword and shield for men who are struggling with commercial sex. It allows men to be vulnerable, and to acknowledge the pain in their life. Ultimately, this group effectively restores our desire to honor and respect women and children.

In a few weeks a new resource will be made available to all men. This resource, which I have compiled and created myself, will walk any guy through the process of creating a Men Mentoring Men accountability group. It is my strong belief that every guy needs at least one other guy to hold them accountable. Every guy needs support, care, and love. Every guy needs a close, supportive friend. Every guy needs accountability.

February 15, 2011 by Guest

Battle of the Sexes: The Debate for Equal Gender Representation

“No offense, but I don’t trust you,” said Wiveca Holst, a Swedish woman’s rights activist, in an interview with CJ Adams of Polaris Project. Holst explains that her history of working with male activists has been filled with men making honest mistakes, outright poor intentions, and the ‘occasional man who actually respected her as an equal.’ Unfortunately, Holst isn’t alone in her assessment of the male activist role in issues that are often dubbed as ‘women’s issues’. This leads me to wonder, do we need men working on this issue and what do they uniquely contribute to the movement?

As I man, I am ashamed to admit that I know plenty of males who won’t listen to a woman’s opinion, but they will listen to mine. I did not garner their attention based on any merit of my own, but simply because I am a man. There are male leaders combating trafficking; however, from my experience, our presence on the grassroots level is sorely lacking. If we want to effectively combat demand, then we need more active and educated male members joining the fight. Here are three recommendations to activate men to rise as leaders and defenders of America’s children.

Let’s begin educating our kids about the importance of equality. Vern Smith is the founder of The Defenders and the husband of Linda Smith, the founder of Shared Hope International. The Defenders is national initiative aimed at mobilizing 100,000 men in the fight to end the demand for prostituted children. He states the largest problem his organization faces in recruiting new members is ignorance. “So many men I talk to have no idea how big and how close this problem is,” he says. This ignorance might be attributed to the link between children viewing online pornography and how they view sex. One Dutch survey of 471 teens found that the more often young people sought out online porn, the more likely they were to view sex as a purely physical function. If a man views a woman simply as a tool to complete a physical function, can he also view a woman as an intelligent, valuable equal? Unlikely. If our goal is to garner active male support, then we need to combat ignorance toward the issue, and push for gender equality education at a younger age, before children are overexposed.

Prostitutes are victims; let’s change our rhetoric. “Ultimately, the sex industry has made sexual exploitation not only normal but respectable,” stated Janice Raymond Ph.D. of the University of Massachusetts. As Vern Smith states, “the word “prostitute” conveys the idea of willing participation in an immoral act.” By changing our language from calling victims “child prostitutes” to “prostituted children” we not only accurately acknowledge that a crime was committed against them, but support the termination of a damaging stigma.

If you want to become an activist on the forefront of the movement, join The Defenders. Defender’s pledge to not participate in any form of commercial sex, to hold fellow men accountable for their actions toward women, and to take immediate action to protect the ones they love. Take the pledge NOW!